Jasper C. Igot

Kiss Goodbye

"Her flaws forms some kind of constellation, for the universe knew I was out stargazing that night. What else can I do but simply fall in love with them?"  - Sylvester Dean

The sky is blue , green meadows , cool breeze of the wind on a gloomy afternoon. A perfect time to be alive isn’t it? Sitting under a huge tree, listening to mp3 with my favorite songs, waiting for my next class. My name is Sylvester Dean , they fondly call me Sly. Currently, I’am studying botany. No, it’s not a study about  boots. You silly reader. Meanwhile, when I arrive to the classroom , there is an exquisite girl that caught my eyes. She’s sitting at the back , alone. I do not even know how she caught my attention, effortlessly. My professor talks about the course but I cannot really focus because she has my attention, all of it. She have a big round dark eyes, and rosy cheeks. Her hair , flows perfectly without her trying. I wonder if I ask her name, would she give it? I gave it a try. After the class I took the chance. As I walk towards her, my heart inside felt like there is a car racing, not the normal cars but monster cars. “You look familiar” I said. “Hello , do I know you?” she replied. She has the attitude, it makes me like her even more. Her voice seemed like a melody in my ears. “I could’ve sworn we had Chemistry” I added. “I really hate lame pick up lines” she said with a little sexy chuckle. “My name is Nicole , Nicole Hepburn” then she smiled at me. I nearly got a heart attack inside but my outside expression is just plain. I do not use pick up lines but I have to because I ran out of words to say. I think it somehow worked. “Hi Nikky!” I smiled back. “I’am Sly Dean , it’s nice to meet a lovely girl once in a while” I said with a smirk. The bell rang. “Oops, I got to go Sly. It’s a pleasure to meet you, strange guy. See you around!” she hastenly said. Mission accomplished. I got her name, Nicole Hepburn. What a beautiful name with a beholder with such beauty. I guess I’am fortunate enough to meet a fairytale – like princess.

The days have passed by, the more Nikky and I become close. I found out that she likes to eat sweets like chocolate, also she wants some random back rubs for some strange reasons. She always listens to Green Day, she hates it when I try to be like Kanye. She’ll say left, then I’ll be saying right. She’ll be saying yes, then I would just smite. We are kind of opposite, but as the saying goes “Opposite do attracts.”. We kept hanging out, watching movies, staying up late at night for no reason and also keeping up with our studies, of course. She is fun to be with, I admit. I always think about her, I hate this feeling. This is the feeling that reciprocate with hurt. One night, I caught myself staring blankly ahead. I realized then, it was her, scampering in my head. I stared at a picture of her in my wallet. I admit, she have her flaws even if I kept on telling her that she is perfect in every inch. Her flaws forms some kind of constellation, for the universe knew I was out stargazing that night. What else can I do but simply fall in love with them?

One beautiful foggy morning, seeing the majestic sunrise, I hate to wake up early on weekends but I have to because I wanted to buy Nikky some fresh red roses for she deserves it. I picked up the most pretty roses that I saw, then I head to the supermarket to buy some chocolates that she always wants. Her house is a walking distance from supermarket so I walked. I wanted to surprise her because this feeling is getting serious. Suddenly, the beautiful morning of mine turned out to be a grotesque morning. I saw her, with a strange boy. Fetching her, I think they’ll go out. I recognized the boy. He’s also studying at the same university we are in. He called her in an endearment “By”. The back of my ears are heaten, my knees are weaken. I can’t describe the feeling. I felt like cheated even though we are not in a relationship, ironic. What does she means by the way she treats me? Just a friend? So many questions stumble at my head, at my thoughts that day. I really hate myself. I should have stayed in my bed, enjoying some time to sleep. Pathetic Sylvester.

At the classroom, she treats me like all is well. She did not even knew that I saw her with another guy. Nikky gave me a strange hug. I realized, it was the last week of the semester. “We should keep on contacting each other okay?” she said with a sad tone. “I’m going to miss you, badly.”. She have those teary eyes, meant something or nothing? “I also going to miss you, bigtime.”. I replied. Then, I pat her head. A week have passed and she still treats me special, I’am backing off myself to her because I knew we do not have the same feelings for each other. It hurts me, bigtime. I keep my distance at her, I’am repositioning myself to be just a friend to her.

The next moment, I caught myself covered with blood. I coughed so hard, it made me spit blood. I consulted a doctor. Unfortunately, my gream reaper seems like a bit in haste. The result of the check up was leukemia. A dangerous disease in which my body forms too many white blood cells. I’m a white blood celled mammal now, I guess.

I isolate myself to everyone especially to Nicole. I do not want her to be sad if I will pass away. I do not want to see her cry. She keeps on ringing my phone but I don’t pick up. My friends keep telling me that she is looking for me. Until one day, the doctor told me that my life expectancy is 3months. And a year would be a miracle. Two months and 29days have passed, laying in my hospital bed. I have got only one day left. Nikky entered my room. I told her everything. She cried. “It was Carlo, the one you saw who fetched me” she said. I do not even know a thing about him. “He tries to court me, but I told him I love you. He insisted himself and said that one date with me would stop him from courting so I agreed.“ The words stabbed me at my chest, hurts more than my fresh sutures. She did also love me from then? I’m a coward, I guess. “Can you say it again? I think I misheard a phrase.” I smirked. She lightly punch me at my arm. I love seeing her happy, her smile makes me forget the pain I bear right now. “I love you Nicole Hepburn. I do not plan on having this feeling, it just sort of happened.” I confessed. I said it. It’s like a millions of tons removed from my chest when that words emanated from my mouth. Those big dark round eyes of her’s , giving me that look again. “I love you too Mr. Sylvester Dean. Please, live for me.” she sobbed. “If I would have be given a chance to have a second life, I will find you and love you, only you.” I stated with a firm tone. She leans towards me. She gave me the sweetest kiss I ever felt. Her lips, I could’ve kissed them all day if she’d let me. I kissed her back. It felt like bliss. I felt some electrifying feeling inside me. I pause. Then gave her a smile, but I did not realized the tears flooded me. “I love you Nikky.” I cried. I know it’s a little too late. I realized, how cruel this world can be. We are worthy for each other, it’s as if the powers of the universe conspired to make her mine. “I love you always and forever, even death can’t take this feeling to you from me.” I said with my last breath. I kissed her again and said goodbye.

Reference:

googleimage (2016). Photography. Retrieved on September 8, 2016 from    

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